The Memo #17
We should all dine out more and other interesting things I read this week that I thought you might like too.
Everyone is so down on hospitality at the moment, particularly in Wellington, and while the headlines will have you believe everything worth loving is closing its doors, in truth there are some incredible new spots popping up and some of the old classics that can’t be beaten, all of whom need us to eat out more.
I think our generation needs restaurants more than ever. Beyond the basic purpose of providing food and drink, restaurants have, historically, fulfilled a human need for connection and shaped social relations. Acquaintances become friends, strangers become lovers, each across a table in the safe and controlled space of a restaurant. American sociologist Ray Oldenburg coined the term “third places” – those spaces that are neither home nor place of work, places that are crucial to the maintenance of the community and its social capital.
The economic model of restaurants is increasingly difficult if not broken, most places you love struggle to achieve even 5% profitability. They’re wonderfully unstable, volatile places. They’re also, in my view, the last bastion of urban manufacturing and, as such, create a massive number of jobs - close to 9% of all New Zealanders are in hospitality.
I was raised in a restaurant, a hearty provincial Lone Star to be exact, with each of my parents having been in hospitality most of their lives. It’s really hard work. More than half of all new restaurants close or change hands within the first two years of business. Gen Z are drinking less and trying to save more, we’re anti social and on average spending 30% less time out with friends than we did only two decades ago. For a generation that says we would rather spend our money on experiences, we are quick to forget that’s exactly what a restaurant is. It’s no wonder doors of “third places” are closing.
I believe we live our lives with two votes: one cast every three years at the ballot box, and the other every time we open our wallets. If you love a place, you need to show it.
Everywhere I loved eating in August
In July I ticked of the holy trinity of Wellington restaurants Chaat Street, Kisa and Concord. All three are in a league of their own. This month as well as a few classics, I’ve been making an effort to seek out new spots from this list here and everything so far has been amazing (with the exception of Graze, the new wine bar in Kelburn. The person that served us wasn’t kind, and life’s too short for that behaviour.)
Volco - It’s in the old Bretzelmania in Kelburn, their potato flatbread is dreamy and the people that work there are so nice and trendy but at the same time which is a bit of a rarity for Wellington.
Everybody Eats - Worth queueing if you have to, this compassionate social enterprise transforms donated leftover food into a three-course set menu. Everyone working there is a volunteer and you pay what you can.
11 Woodward - A newer gem outside the spinning top on Woodward Street serving up onion dip and chips.
Nicoletta’s - Nicoletta is a lovely woman in Miramar who bakes arguably Wellingtons best doughnuts fresh every morning at the cutest cafe south of the Colbam Drive pedestrian crossing.
Puffin - Just as good a spot at 5pm as it is when the clock strikes midnight.
1154 Pastaria - The place to go when you don’t know where you feel like going. A safe bet in a stable of Cuba St options.
Kazu Sushi-Go-Round - There is little I love more than an interactive dining experience. Hot pot, teppanyaki, a fajita - still nothing beats a soosh train.
Astoria - These guys are nailing it. The menu is incredible and the vibe makes my morning meetings there feel way more important than they actually are.
Neo - I think TripAdvisor is lazy in calling this the Capitals best cafe, but it’s the breakfast version of 1154. It never misses.
Le Bella Italia - One of the all time greats in Petone. It’s that restaurant meets grocery store aesthetic that I love.
Istana Malaysia - Number one BYO in Wellington. Change my mind.
The Ramen Shop - The one in Newtown. Next time it rains, go here and you won’t be sad anymore.
Weekly reads
Kiwi Tax System Remunerates Bottom Half by Federico Magrin for The Post. Just a good piece on tax really. Our system needs a huge shake up, our aging population means the status quo isn’t sustainable. Half of kiwi households receive more from the Government than they pay in taxes and at the wealthiest New Zealanders pay on average only 8.9% tax on their income.
Welcome To New MILF Cinema by Rachel Handler for New York Magazine. There has been a surge of half a dozen films with almost exactly the same plot this year. Very attractive, white, successful, wealthy, ‘older’ woman with great hair, see Nicole Kidman/Anne Hathaway/etc, falls for much younger greek god of a man - it’s just casual, then it’s more, then it’s nothing at all, then they live happily ever after. A good critique on if these films truly subvert traditional age-gap norms or reinforce them…
RFK Jr. Was My Drug Dealer by Kurt Andersen for The Atlantic. I felt physically quite uncomfortable reading this piece but I thought it worth sharing. These are the sorts of people who make it to the top in the supposed meritocracies that we live in.
Why Americans Suddenly Stopped Hanging Out by Derek Thompson for The Atlantic. A great piece on the screen time epidemic.
All Blacks Player Ratings: Jordie Barrett Blitzes It, Then Bench Blow It In Loss To Springboks by Aaron Goile for Stuff. A clear lack of depth in last night’s squad, also a nice change to see men being rated out of ten by a stranger for once.
Side note: 2,500 people are murdered in Johannesburg every year. The city is so dangerous that yesterday’s clash was played in the earlier than usual because it is just that unsafe to be out at night.
I Am Childless, But Not by Choice by Eugenia Cheng for The Wall Street Journal. The share of American women between the ages of 25 and 44 who are childless has risen from under 20% in 1977 to nearly 35% in 2022. The thought that this is by choice is blatantly untrue. In truth around 75% of women over 40 who have no children had hoped to be mothers.
“Critics of these trends, including Republican vice presidential nominee JD Vance, worry that women are squandering our most fertile years chasing a good education and a fulfilling career. We are accused of turning to motherhood only when our résumés glitter with other accomplishments and then of acting shocked when our bodies don’t cooperate. Or, worse, we are guilty of giving priority to our own desires over devoting ourselves to the health of the next generation.
This was not my experience at all.
I was horrified when I turned 30 and motherhood was nowhere on the horizon. When women are unable to have children because they can’t find a suitable partner and don’t want to do it alone, this is sometimes called “social infertility.” Time merely compounded this problem for me. With every new accomplishment—in a male-dominated field, no less—I seemed to become less appealing to men.””
Something living in my head rent free
Philip Polkinghorne, who I still don’t think murdered his wife, has got me thinking about how many functional uses of methamphetamine there are in New Zealand. The man was smoking it in his workplace, the same workplace he preformed eye-saving miracle surgeries.
Quote of the week
Normal is a setting on the washing machine - Rae Family proverb, shared with me at board game night on Wednesday.
Fact of the week
Average sperm counts worldwide have declined by half over the past 50 years. Men over 40 are about half as fertile as those under 25, with children born to older fathers, often at elevated risk of birth defects, health problems and mental health disorders such as schizophrenia and bipolar disorder. Time we stopped pinning it all on older mums…
Happy reading,
Maddy x